A Tiny Bit Peeved At Asda Langley Mill

Thanks to dayvee for filling in with his grumpiness while mine was taking a break ;-)

The majority of this post was written on June 17th, I didn't publish it then as  I was hanging on to it as promises had been made to me by Asda - thus I was hoping that things would improve - so no real point in venting my spleen. But seeing as things were exactly the same while we were at home last time, I decided to finish it: 

Just lately I seem to have had more than my fair share of annoyances - well I think so, and it's my blog and I'll whinge if I want to.

I won't go into great detail of all of my gripes here or I may just upset someone; and that would never do. But be warned - if the cap fits - this worm is on the turn. I will continue now with peeves that I am allowed to write about:

Ahem ... t'other Tuesday (29th May) we returned back to Langley Mill, there was no prising my fingers off of anything to make me leave my beloved tin hut this time, because I knew that when I got home I was eagerly anticipating the arrival of two items in the post.

1. A shiny new Android jobby aka a Samsung Galaxy S2.
2. A sheet of Baader AstroSolar safety film for my latest hobby (more about that soon).

Anyway, that very same evening, hang on, I need to check my 'tweets' for the times ... Aha, we'd been home two hours apparently - making it about 11.20 at night, when I was vibrating where I sat.

I went upstairs and looked through the window at the offending item before I stomped across to Asda, thinking they'd got a freezer unit parked up for their 'deep clean'. I was wrong (it happens). I asked the security guard - nicely, my bad temper had fizzled out in that short distance - for the manager. He duly arrived and I was apologised to and informed that it was a three hours late chiller lorry ... one of the old NOISY kind.

I can actually do the rest of this blog post with my tweets pertinent to Asda and life for me  - at this time - in Langley Mill. I've missed the other, much nicer and possibly more ladylike stuff out.

Of course, you're not forced to read it, but apart from me removing a few hash-tags (no, can't be bothered, I'll leave 'em)  and maybe moderating a bit of my worst bluster, the tweets are entirely genuine, as well as the dates and times stated.

• 29 May 23.49 I must be on a very short fuse. Only been home 2 hours and already been across to #Asda to complain - but I was being shaken out of my chair.
• 29 May 23.51 A chuffin (3 hours) late chiller lorry ... one of the old NOISY kind apparently. #AsdaLangleyMill night manager was lovely ... I wasn't ;-)
• 30 May  6.16 Effin #Asda #LangleyMill have had me awake nearly 2 effin hours already with effin deliveries! Chucking lumps of metal in there now. Wan**rs
• 30 May  6.19  Am now resigned to my awake status & started work. So thanks for that #Asda noisy sods! 3 wks away make me realise we put up with crap here! 
• 30 May  6.25 At least I know where sun comes up (in case it's clear enough) for photos of #TransitOfVenus next week. I shall rely on #Asda to get me up.
• 30 May 7.01 #Asda chiller lorry is out-noising my washing machine 2 rooms away. do you think I may be in a bad mood? Less than 4 hours sleep does that!
• 1 Jun 9.03 Took a borrowed dog for a walk, looks very busy inside old #Netto. It's surprising how well the weeds in #LangleyMill hide #Asda's litter.
• 2 Jun 0.28 Oh bo**ox. It's twatting teenage loony time in #LangleyMill. Morons shouting to each other about what time it is in front of our house :-(
• 2 Jun 0.30 I'd forgotten how delightful #LangleyMill could be on a Friday night. That's only 3rd time they've been past lately. Roll on next week :-)
• 2 Jun 0.33 Although now I think about it, it'll be same every night. Hope it rains every night, keep the little darlings at home with mummy & daddy ;-)
• 2 Jun 0.36 & here they come again. Looked like they'd been evicted from #Asda earlier the way they were shoving trolleys about. Oh to be young & bored.
• 2 Jun 2.06 Now I'm being shaken out of bed by an effin #Asda freezer lorry delivering more crap. I suppose it'll be the squeaky gates opening next :-(
• 2 Jun 2.19 Brrrrrm ... bang, clatter. I wonder how many lies the #Asda manager would be prepared to tell about this delivery being late. Good training!
• 2 Jun 2.26 Rumble rumble rumble rumble rumble. Funny there were no reversing squawks or bleeps. Maybe they thought it would wake me up. Rumble rumble.
• 2 Jun 2.29 I suppose I could count #Asda pallets rumbling off the lorry instead of counting sheep to see if I could get back to sleep.
• 2 Jun 2.34 Bugger, I've been awake so long that I'm hungry... Boom, squeak, brrrrrm clatter, clang. That's it, he's off. Another #Asda delivery done.
• 2 Jun 2.38 They were very quiet with the gates. Damn that's annoying. I do like to whinge about #Asda's squeaky gates. Must have done good complaining.
• 2 Jun 2.41 Well I'm very awake, playing I-spy on my own in the dark could be a challenge. I know, I'll open the blind & use #Asda's security light :-)
• 2 Jun 3.12 Firkin hell! another bloody #Asda delivery. This one blared his bleeding horn! #SWAIN I think it says on front.
• 2 Jun 3.14 Oh dear, half way through last tweet & he blared horn again. I lost the plot & went across in my dressing gown & trainers. Got nasty :-)
• 2 Jun 3.17 Got on to security guard. Apologised to him. Saw a Kev (I think). Apparently no night staff & guess what!? Delivery was hours late. To**ers
• 2 Jun 3.23 On the bright side, I Heard a cuckoo & then took photos of hedgehog on next door's yard. Rumble rumble rumble rumble. http://pic.twitter.com/ocXFYCg0
• 2 Jun 3.26 Ahhhh, grumpy has made me a lovely cup of tea. Rumble rumble rumble rumble. Long effin #Asda delivery 3.25 now. Rumble rumble rumble rumble.
• 2 Jun 3.29 Oh s**t. I will no doubt be immortalised on a security video dressed like a Clampit, ranting & waving my arms about... Rumble rumble rumble
• 2 Jun 3.36 Aha, tosspot has done his #Asda delivery. I do hope all his tyres spontaneously burst on the motorway. That chuffin gate is quiet tonight :)
• 2 Jun 3.42 I've not had an hours sleep yet. I'll be ever so lovely tomorrow... Not! I wish I wasn't so grumpy, but I am being pushed a bit far.
• 2 Jun 4.34 Wonder if #Asda #LangleyMill have finally realised they don't need to open 24hours seeing as there's no night staff. Oh yeah am still awake.
• 2 Jun 4.37 I could eat a scabby dog's leg, I am starving! Hmm, come here scabby dog. Pthooo... too hairy ;-)
• 2 Jun 5.21 Yet another #Asda delivery yawn. Oh yeah, security guard reminded me that it was a business & they had to deliver through the night. Rubbish
• 2 Jun 5.25 Still not been to sleep since they woke me with #Asda delivery at 2.00am. This one is bleeping in & there's some nice preparation clanking!
• 2 Jun 5.28 How many attempts does he need to reverse into #Asda? Still chuffin bleeping. Ahh, he's in. Now for the rumbles to start.
• 2 Jun 5.31 I think I'll print my tweets & give them to Ms #Asda manager when I visit her tomorrow oops today. Will save me telling her what I think :'(
• 2 Jun 6.13 And another completed #Asda delivery. Yes I'm still awake. Bang clank. And another one in. Oh it's effin freezer lorry now. Chuff me!
• 2 Jun 6.22 #Asda really taking wee wee now with bloody banging & clanking, now rumbling. They in too much hurry. You're a load of to**ers in there! :-(
• 2 Jun 6.45 Well this has to be considered one of #Asda's noisiest deliveries yet. I really don't know how they got plans passed for 24hour deliveries.
• 2 Jun 6.47 I still haven't slept, 1st 2 hours #Asda's delightful younger customers. (trolley in middle of road). Rest of night delivery after delivery!
• 2 Jun 6.52 Bloody hell! Another one. Bloody #ARLA now, he did a turn around the yard, he'll have to wait his turn until freezer lorry done :-(
• 2 Jun 6.55 #Kingsmill waiting at #Asda now. At least he's relatively quiet. But Asda's own lorry is still clanking. Yes the blind is open so I can see!
• 2 Jun 6.58 Have #Asda forgotten that they're open bank hols? I'm sure they must have had more deliveries than normal for the prats panic shopping.
• 2 Jun 7.05 I need to find somewhere else to live. Many more nights like this I'll end up in a nut house. Or prison when I'm driven to do summat stupid!
• 2 Jun 7.10 Sick of hearing that bloody #Asda lorry engine. Oh, he's going. #ARLA is back for his turn, #Kingsmill is in. Oh it's Arla making noise now!
• 2 Jun 7.14 Got a headache, that's every morning since I've been back in this hole! I'd like someone from #Asda to come here to listen to all this crap!
• 2 Jun 7.19 I see last night's little #Asda shoppers left a can on neighbours car as well as trolley in road. How delightful. http://pic.twitter.com/9HsjSfd9
• 2 Jun 7.43 #ARLA is still bloody droning on & on. Meanwhile there's all the clanking in the background. I hate #Asda. Ooh, they've left yard gate open.
• 2 Jun 7.46 I could nip round & do some real damage, yeah right. They've got my name, address, phone number... And my #Clampit impression on video :-)
• 2 Jun 7.50 Disguise, oh yes! Stilts & a beard... And #ARLA drones on... Dark glasses & a wig. Effin tannoy now! They're coming to take me away haha ;-)
• 2 Jun 7.54 Ha! #ARLA is done. He struggles in & out that gate every time. Have I gone deaf? My ears hurt. Ooh weird, oh not to worry cages clattering.
• 2 Jun 9.13 Woohoo! Just had phone call from #Asda apologising for last night & they're trying to get it sorted. Apparently they're having depot issues.
• 2 Jun 19.13 Had another phone call from #Asda #LangleyMill to warn us of impending late noise tonight. My #Clampit impression must have been scary :-D
• 3 Jun 00.22 #Asda's promised late delivery has arrived. I don't honestly know what to make of them telling me, as they always have one at this time.

During my phone-call from Asda, I was - as is their wont - assured that Asda don't receive deliveries during the night and this was only a one off as they were having problems at their depot. The ACTUAL manager was on the phone to them about my complaint of that moron blaring the horn six times just before 3.00am. To be honest in my opinion, Asda is just a cheap business, run on a shoestring and bugger anyone who lives nearby because they'll just lie to you, even with the evidence of their own eyes.

Update 9th July: 

As I said at the start, I saved the above for when we went home again to either NOT publish because Asda in their wisdom decided to give me some peace; having promised to sort things out regards night time noise. Or more likely for when I was going to be in another bad mood, i.e. when Asda next kept me awake. Unfortunately my brain is so fuzzy from lack of sleep when I'm at home that this has had to wait until I was 'tin-hutted' again.

We were at home for 139 hours (Tuesday afternoon - Monday morning), in that time Asda and the feral pack of teenagers that roam Langley Mill's streets at night allowed me to sleep all of 16 hours; and none of them were undisturbed. 

Anyway, it's safe to say that Asda staff talk a load of BO**OCKS. Nothing whatsoever has changed. I was up all night alternately working and tweeting - but we're already bored with the last lot so I'm not repeating them - again last week while we were home.

What I really can't stand and take exception to, is the bare faced lies senior Asda staff tell about their deliveries 'never happening at night unless they're late'. I counted seven deliveries in one night between 2.50am and 7.00am. Time you stopped lying Asda, and it's also time I stopped giving you the chance to improve because you'll never - voluntarily - do it ...