Saturday, 13 March 2010

Another Snippet from Ted

Yet another Friday night effort from Ted, comment on 'Not Rumours After All':

My God Lady Grumpess, this is serious stuff, going to be far worse than anything HH have managed to conjure up. Rest assured my dear Grumpess you can rely on my support and active involvement should you embark on a campaign to KEEP OUR HEANOR HAULGE.

I thought your holiday sounded crap, and your poor Grumpy old man, inprisoned in a souped up garden shed with you and your family tribe, his only happy memories being the occasional p**s up some evenings, a sore rosette from riding those bloody bikes and a go down the slide in the Aquadrome. You sure know how to push the boat out your Ladyship.

I may analize your remarks and get back to you later.

In the mean time sleep tight my precious Grumpess and take care.

Oh dear Ted,

what's up? Won't anyone let you play with them on Friday nights that you find yourself desperate enough to read my blog? Hmm, you don't read it though, you skim it or you'd know we didn't stay with my family at Center Parcs or use bikes and there were certainly no p**s ups as you so eloquently put it.

Yep, worried about what we'll get instead of HH - better the devil you know blah blah, but no-one seems to know [or haven't said] what's going on that bit of land yet.

My friends will wonder why I'm allowing myself to rise far enough to take your bait yet again, they were a little put out by your last comment and knowing me and the GOM [unlike you do] couldn't quite understand what you were getting at. You see, you're not bothering me, I leave myself wide open on here and accept that not everyone will be happy about what I write. But I do take exception at your wildly inaccurate assumptions about my family being a tribe and the grumpy old man getting pi**ed.

Oh, by the way, you won't like the next two holidays I'm going on either - but I will blog about them if I want to.

Now, I'm sure no-one is holding a gun at your head forcing you to read what I write, so if you don't like it then read something else, either way, in future if you must comment at all then please save all your comments for me or push off, there's a good chap ...


  1. Heanor Haulage will hopefully be gone by 30th March as I have an agreement for a short term lease in order to keep my pigs at the rear of their premises as well as my pigeons.

  2. Now this is more like it - a proper honest informative comment. It's a real shame you've only got a short term lease though. The grumpy old man and I are both re-reading the James Herriot books and I was with Queenie, Marigold and her litter of piglets [It shouldn't Happen To A Vet] only last night. Lovely animals ;)

  3. I read the comments of Anonymous with interest, I have actually secured a long term lease on the Asda site but am not permitted to start trading until the store has been open for three months, my venture is a Bingo Hall/Night Club exclusively for the more mature person, there will be all day Bingo followed by a Bar/Disco through till late. Only classic vintage ballads, 60's pop and jazz music will be played, ie Geraldo, Glen Miller,Ted Heath, Kenny ball, Humphrey Littleton etc. During the hot summer nights it is hoped the activities will spill over on to our lawn outside.
    I hope to recruit the 30 staff required locally, therefor, if there are any experienced Bingo Callers, Bar Managers and Bar Staff looking for work then I will be pleased to here from you in due course. It is hoped the venture will help boost the local economy further and bring another dimension to shopping at Asda.
    It is hoped to have Dame Vera Lynn perform the opening ceremony (she is a friend of a friend and occassionally obliges) and so Anonymous, on the opening day will you feed your pigs early to get them off to sleep quickly and please don't fly the pigeons as they may soil Dame Vera's hat.

    Maggie Mansfield, NG16.

    P.S. I would like to order half a leg of pork and half a pork loin from the chump end for this Christmas.

  4. I don't know why you don't start your own blog, you're obviously full of wit - or something. The tragic thing is anonymous, there's only you and me reads the comments - you with your Tiscali ISP, Win XP system, ie7 browser and your 1024x768 resolution monitor. Try landing somewhere different to 'Langley Mill Morons'. That too is a give away to your 'completely anonymous' status. Apart from that, I'm really enjoying your comments, keep them coming ;)

  5. No, not Bravenet or IP address location. They are just decoys - you're looking for something that's invisible ...


Be nice, I'm very sensitive.