Friday, 7 August 2009

Aha! Found The Missing Sentence

I've been cruising t'interweb again [crumbly version of surfing the Internet], looking for my most favourite subject [at the moment] of Asda in Langley Mill & I came across the missing sentence - the one that said 'Planners are expected to make a decision on July 15th'. Only it's in an earlier edition of the Derby Evening Telegraph - 4th June, rather than the one I saw on 13th July. Now I've pointed it out, I wonder how long it'll take for this sentence to disappear [I like being paranoid, it keeps me calm].

Oh by the way Asda, even though you've successfully removed the phantom 'Asda in Hucknall' from your website map, you've forgotten to erase it from the pdf download, so you'd better get your rubber out again.

While I'm in a Asda-ish mood I think I'll have another little dig -

Saint Asda

Do Asda ever do anything for themselves? I mean, don't they want to make a profit or are they just doing everything for our benefit?

'We want to kick-start a regeneration scheme' along with 'Creating jobs' & 'Bringing benefits to shoppers'

I think they need to find some more quotes as they're starting to read like a broken keyboard [well you can't say 'sound like a broken record', can you?].

Why don't they say it like it is? I'd be far more inclined to believe Asda if they said 'We want to build an Asda store here so you'll shop with us, we'll offer you good value & quality, plus as an added bonus, it'll give Tesco a "right drubbing"'.
See, look how much better that was, I'm sold on the idea already. :))

Lets face it, t'Interweb isn't doing Asda any favours. In the olden days booklets could be dished out in the area they wished to build a new store, quoting 'positive regeneration - for wherever' and everyone would be suitably impressed. But in these days of high-speed news & batty old women with far, far too much time on their hands, it's starting to be noticeable [that is the correct spelling of noticable, I don't like it but I stand corrected] that every one of Asda's proposed stores has the same 'Look how wonderful we are' quotes.

This can only mean that -

a. Asda always picks grotty areas to build their stores, ensuring that there's little or no objection [annoyingly this is probably true]
b. It's high time they got someone else to write their little booklets -
Ahem! I'm quite cheap and just look how annoying I can be left to my own devices ...

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