Monday, 1 August 2011

Langley Mill's Flowers 2011

Before I get carried away with my latest moan I'll just share the latest rumours that a fellow grumpy has passed on:

Apparently some of the businesses at the end of Cromford Road, including an Indian restaurant, a repair/workshop garage and the car park where our council recycling bins disappeared from, have been offered lots of money by a developer, I'm told that these offers were turned down and there have now been larger offers made.

Why doesn't a developer want to offer us even moderate amounts of money? It doesn't seem fair when we're so willing to negotiate.

Anyway on to my latest whinge, 90% of which has been waiting to be published for about three weeks, but having been in a better mood lately [away at the tin hut] and thinking 'hey, give 'em a chance' I put it on hold. Of course, back at home and a few sleepless nights courtesy of Asda's squeaky gates and their annoying deliveries have brought me back to my grumpy senses.

Top of Bridge Street

Asda, isn't it about time you got Grace Landscapes to replace the plants that succumbed to last winter's weather. I mean the plants at the top of Bridge Street. We're not bothered about the ones further down - just past our peasants entrance to Asda - as one thick woman encouraged her children to slide over the snow covered plants and killed them all, but we actually care about them up here.

Several weeks ago now [17th May to be precise], my neighbour told the bark-blower [skilled job, wouldn't mind it myself] that they needed replacing, he made a note to say we needed sixty-odd new plants and said he'd draw a diagram for them back at the office. We've also watered the trees - and the few remaining plants - across from us, because as we all know water goes downhill; so leaving our bit parched and they were at least a month's growth behind their bigger cousins half way down the street.

Update August 27th:
Hmm, Grace Landscapes have said they'll do more planting in the autumn because if they replaced the plants now it would mean they'd have to come and water them - so?

Update January 2012:
It looks a lot like Grace Landscapes were telling lies, they had no intention of replacing any plants whatsoever - another grab the cash and run merchant. Someone new has got the contract for Asda's gardens.

Spot the Difference - Langley Mill and Eastwood
And now on to my bigger moan - still alas, plant orientated - and yes, I'm still using big words while I can remember what they mean ... and I'm English so will pooh pooh any suggestion that I use 'oriented' rather than 'orientated'.

I know our councils are supposed to be saving money, blah blah, but how come some councils can take the time, effort and a moderate expense to make the places we live, work and shop in look a bit more cheerful, and others, well ... don't.

Heanor's Entire Floral Display
Some councils would rather spend an exorbitant sum on a chunk of metal suffering from some sort of heavy duty metal-worm with a hula hoop stuck through it [yeah, yeah, I know there were art grants, donations blah, blah, blah]. You can tell I don't really like modern art - I like to recognise what it is that I'm looking at, rather than needing it explaining to me.

And if that's the sort of 'art' you're into, I can show you - for an arbitrary fee - an unmade bed [daily], and for no extra charge you can have a peek in my drawer full of excess lotions and potions - I will call this 'artistic' drawer 'Hormonal Imbalance'. I've also got a workmate plus lots of spare mahogany doors and a big drill if you prefer your 'art' with ventilation. Do feel free to call me a grumpy old philistine, because I simply don't care.

Hang on, I'm losing me thread here ... Oh yeah, flowers ... councils ... money:

Expensive Wing Thing
The same council then tell the world at large that they've been working on and improving Heanor. Ahem, we went through Heanor the other day and apart from some unsightly buildings having been demolished, I couldn't see any real improvement.

Now, having only previously seen a photo of this metal 'wing' thing - and the £20,000 price tag - I fully expected it to be on the 'Angel of the North' proportions. Ahem, it wasn't - and any time now it'll probably find itself on the back of one of the many opportunistic and no doubt illegal scrap wagons that turns up at least three times a week.

Eastwood's Flowers
We frequently pass through - and stop to shop in - our neighbouring Eastwood [Broxtowe council] and practically every lamppost has flowers on it, not to mention the troughs and multi-tiered containers. It actually lifts your spirits to see them and puts you in a much better - spending - mood. Or would have, had I not just been through Langley Mill, because Langley Mill's [Amber Valley Borough Council] lampposts are completely bare and our troughs contain grass and weeds - yes, neighbour ... before you gasp for breath in a 'that's the pot calling the kettle black' kind of way, I will admit to giving root room to a few weeds myself.

Eastwood's Flowers
I suppose someone will eventually feel the urge to put me straight about it being our local councils that decide whether or not to pretty up the neighbourhood - Well that's OK, I can blame them too, I'm nothing if not generous.

You know, I'm starting to experience a bit of déjà vu - spooky - or maybe this is a lot like my 2009 Christmas lights moan ...

1 comment:

  1. lol you sound like me! I am forever writing into the Scottish Express daily paper with one moan or another (one in this week)
    We are lucky as we have lots of planters in the town. I hope your town sorts it all out soon.


Be nice, I'm very sensitive.